THRIVE:
As you may already know, Alabama defeated LSU last night in the BCS National Championship game. Our offense and play calling were hapless. Les Miles, LSU's coach, stubbornly kept in Jordan Jefferson as quarterback. He should have replaced him with SMARTER Jarrett Lee, who can throw deep strikes and vertical passes.
I can smile that LSU won the SEC and finished with an impressive 13-1 record and #2 in the AP Poll. An achievement that basketball schools like Maryland and Tennessee (which has sucked for decades) can only envy.
Predictably, a ragtag group of haters had a field day writing on my Facebook wall:
Hahahaha!!! ROLL TIDE ALL OVER YOUR BELOVED TIGERS! GEAUX TIDE!!!
Reauxl Tide! LSU-zers!!
Ouch. What a humiliating loss. Embarrassed for you and the Tigers. Awful. War Eagle.
The way LSU got beat tonight, they're gonna have to change their mascot to Rhianna.
Do they have your tennis coach?
Do we need to put you on suicide watch yet?
Every one of these hateful commenters intended to inflict emotional pain. Little do they know I THRIVE on negative energy. When you knock me down, I dust off and get stronger. This is the way of the Sith. WE THRIVE ON CHALLENGES, CONFLICT, AND REVENGE.
So, as you haters gloat today over my misfortune... know that my head is still held high. If I had a choice to switch places with you losers, I wouldn't.
HATER STATISTICS:
Their favorite football team records:
Maryland 2-10
Minnesota 3-9
Tennessee 5-7
Northwestern 6-7
Auburn 8-5
Average anal diameter gape:(KK and CB skewed data)
6.8"
Average penis size:(not even LT could increase this stat to something respectable)
5.5"
Average Squish factor:
Pillsbury Doughboy
Average Masculinity:
Flaaaaaaming and fierce with lots of flare!
Average Athletic Ability:
Mama wrote notes to exclude them from physical education
posted by Brettcajun at Tuesday, January 10, 2012
5 Comments:
Aww, Brett. Some of those messages left on your facebook page were harsh. LSU came into Tuscaloosa in November and beat us, so I kept my comments leading up to the game at a minimum. I didn't expect LSU to be so horrible on offense. I kept waiting for the Bama turnover to put LSU back into the game but it never happend. LSU had one hell of a year.No one in college football has a resume like LSU. The only thing that got away from them was beating Bama on their home turf.
Just like the game in Tuscaloosa, the defenses dominated the game.
Oh well, LSU will be preseason #1. Bama will be losing a bunch of players on both sides of the ball, so getting back to a BCS Bowl Game will be tough for us. But who knows, stranger things have happend, plus Auburn will be fucking horrible. I know we can come together with our hatred for Auburn.
I still think you're adorable and such a good sport. Thank you for participating in the Bowl Mania Challenge. Once again, I was on top of you in the final standings, but whose's counting....LOL.
Take care, Brett.... you're still HOT!
At least you included my FB comment here. Yayyy. I'm someone.
But if our hatred makes you stronger, in theory, shouldn't you be invincible by now? : )
It didn't work for the Emperor, it's not working for you either.
Well, life goes on.
So where are you going to watch the Saints' game on Saturday afternoon?
You know, I sent you a nice email, with no snark whatsoever, and I don't even get a mention? Fine. When I suck your cock, I'm using my teeth.
If it makes you feel better, the Brees Nyquil commercials are in heavy rotation in Dc and even though he snores about as loud as the BF, I don't wish failure on the the Saints. Well that and our most awesome office at work is near New Orleans and I can't hate.
That and now that you're no longer engaged to Jimbo, I can go back to mentally setting you up with super nice guys w/o criminal records in DC.
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