Tuesday, June 07, 2011

So, we meet again...

"Tell me what you regard as your greatest strength, so I will know how best to undermine you; tell me of your greatest fear, so I will know which I must force you to face; tell me what you cherish most, so I will know what to take from you; and tell me what you crave, so that I might deny you." ----Darth Plagueis
Once upon a time, as a young Sith Acolyte, I met Mexico City's racquetball champion. In our first tennis tournament, we were paired together as doubles partners. Jacob had less tennis experience than me, but his tenacity caught my attention.

Jacob has a passion for winning. During play, every fiber of his being is committed to defeating his foe. He lunges ferociously after each and every ball like a charging bull to a matador. We are kindred raging spirits.

It was at this tournament that I would learn the cruelness of Sith training. Not only would I join forces with Jacob to defeat weaker teams, but I would have to eliminate him as well. Which I DID... SMIRK. ;)

As the years have past, I have watched Jacob's progress from afar. To my surprise and dismay, his on-court success and ranking has outpaced my own. In fact, he won last year's HOUTEX, whereas I flopped out in humiliating fashion in the second round.

Today, Darth Jacobus arrives in New Orleans as a more powerful Sith Lord. Naturally, he challenged me to a tennis match. As is customary between Sith, we trash talked each other. (Cracking Knuckles)

I texted Darth Jacobus, "Rest up little boy... it will be a battle at the Hilton Riverside!" He replied back, "This little boy is going to whip your ass so bad that you will be asking for mercy. See you at the battlefield."

Groooowl. Such talk intoxicates us Sith, filling our hearts with adrenaline and whipping us into a bloodlust frenzy. Defeat me and I will respect you. This is the way of the Sith.
Sith Jacobus vs. Sith Brettcajun
Hilton - New Orleans Riverside - Indoor Courts
5:30pm, June 7th, 2011


Blogger JockBro said...

Sith training? You are hilarious :) You have some serious issues when it comes to tennis baby haha. Love it.

June 07, 2011  
Blogger RG said...

So, you've finally gone over to the dark side. As if, we didn't know that already.

Go get 'em Brett. Kick his ass.

June 07, 2011  
Anonymous Prickly Martin said...

Your poor momma...

June 08, 2011  

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