A Whole Lotta Crazy in There:
On the Eve of battle, all preparations have been made. Weapons sharpened. There will be no pity for those left in the path of what's rightfully mine: a Championship Trophy. I own five Finalist trophies. That means I have played (and humiliatingly lost) in five championship matches. I am the goddamn Susan Lucci of the GLTA world!!! Grrr...
To say that I am a tad obsessed in months prior to a tournament would be an understatement. 100% of my focus is on this tournament. I haven't had sex (or wanted it) since Labor Day weekend. Hell, I haven't been in a bar since that time either. Sex and beer equal unnecessary roadblocks.
Does gearing up for a tennis tournament warp my mental state? You betcha! I become like Kathleen Turner in Serial Mom. I initiate PSYOPS to mess with court rivals. Whether it be by text message or email, my rivals know I am coming. I will not rest until I have their wiggly hearts on a fireplace poker.
It is a challenge to stay focused on fitness goals. Just last night, my Mom invited me over to eat Chili. I must have looked thin, because the first question she asked was --"How many days in a row have you played tennis?" My answer: "five". She expressed concern. "We have lots of Chili... fix you a big bowl". The sirens in my head immediately began to sound. Et tu Mommy?
"Why don't you have a Sunkist soda with that?", she suggested. I locked onto her with a steely gaze. Is she plotting to fatten me up on the eve of the Texas Open?! "I'll have a diet coke." I successfully blocked Mom's feeble attempt at sabotaging my well armed battle station.
Mom didn't let up. "Baby, why don't you take home some Chili to eat for lunch and dinner?" I scowled. "I have a tennis match tomorrow... lessons the next day... I won't have time to eat." She frowned. I smirked. Another victory for me.
Yeah. It's crazy town in my head right now. What will Tim, the new Boyfriend, think of all this? I dunno. Let's see if I can hide some of the super competitive. I would hate to scare him away. LOL. Stay tuned...
I'll be in Dallas on Thursday!