Crucifixion of the Lizard Jesus
Is it not disheartening to find a dried up lizard in your home? The pangs of guilt weigh heavy on the conscience. If only you had seen the reptile in time, you would have safely escorted it outside. Surely, outside would provide all the food and water a lizard would need. Especially since we have been blessed with summer showers almost everyday in Louisiana.
The Shrew and I were astonished to find this lizard dead outside on his French Quarter balcony Sunday morning. The most shocking part was the way the lizard died. The historical reference was unmistakable in our eyes.
Did we just stumble upon the Crucifixion of the Lizard Jesus? Did he die for the sins of all the lizards? Our hearts were thumping with the realization we had just witnessed a momentous event in the lizard kingdom.
Being the good Catholics we are, we promptly did the Sign of the Cross and said our Hail Mary's. We will probably scream like little girls if the Lizard Jesus shall somehow reappear a second time.
By the way, we have chosen to call all non-believers "Lews". Chances are, there is probably a Lewish Temple near you.