Give Me Botulism or Give Me Death!
It has been exactly 14 years ago today since I was dragged by my left ear to the Elder Gay Council (EGC). Cruella Deville, as I call her, chose to be my Elder Gay Sponsor. She plucked me away from my parent's home and was determined to teach me the mysterious ways of the gay world. It did not take her long to find out that I would be a "problem child".
By the fifth day in her care, Cruella Deville was ready to choke her young Gaydi apprentice. She rushed me in the dead of night to the EGC. As I lay there naked and stripped of my fine clothes, I was barraged by a litany of scoldings from the Elder Gays. They warned me that one day my narcissism would be my undoing. I was begged to not give in to the powers of the Vain Side. It would only drive me insane as I became an older gay.
Flashback to the present. Here I sit with my ghastly crow's feet mocking me in the mirror. They used to be tiny bird footprints. Now they are full sized T-Rex tracks! Must I now go through life without ever cracking a smile? Has Father Time reduced me to only greeting my friends with pursed lips now?
CJ, a HOT Daddy Bear, even offered me his services with a workaround solution to my crow's feet. I laughed lots... before I cried.
What about my blog career? Am I forever banished to live out the rest of my life in a Photoshop World? Or do I take the plunge and go under the needle? Stay tuned for the "Return of the Gaydi".